Getting Told

I find political correctness to be an absolutely irritating thing.  I believe the conception of the term has take common decency in language to an absurd level.  It is necessary to avoid certain words or phrases in language in order to keep from offending, but there is a point where this becomes ridiculous.  For example, the word n*gger should never be used as it is derogatory.  However, I have been told that using the term "black" rather than "African American" is now offensive.  Leaving aside the obvious hypocrisy as this person proceeds to call me as "white," is it really upsetting to be described?  I am white.  That does not offend me, so I wonder why this person finds it offensive to be called black.  What's wrong with being black?  Pondering this subject, I came to the conclusion that race is not the issue.  The issue is that people are seeking out reasons to get offended.  They are looking for a way to put someone else in the wrong, to nitpick and find some way to feel better about themselves at the cost of the other person.  The root cause:  pride.  It is the pride that says, "I'm better than you," or even, "I'm as good as you!  Do you see?  You do that, and I don't.  That makes me better than you!"  The same thing has occurred in people who claim Christ as their savior.  I don't drink and you do, or I don't smoke and you do!  I'm better.  And then there is this one:  "I'm straight and you're living the gay lifestyle!  That makes me better!  Do you see?  I'm up here, and you're down there!  Ha!  Me equals better!"  It is really sad that the world has that view of us.  Instead of seeing people that genuinely love them, they see people that are saying, "I'm better than you!  Get out of my church!"  They should be seeing, "I love you.  Jesus loves you.  Come on in.  You are welcome here."

Do not get me wrong here.  Homosexuality is wrong.  So is having sex with anyone who is not your spouse, murdering, lying, stealing, etc.  The point is:  How are we presenting the love of Christ?  If we are going to them in love and gentleness, that is all we can do.  They may get offended anyway, that is not our fault.  We are not to judge them as those outside the church.  God will take care of that.  Our job is to love them as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us.

It is not just people outside the church who are overly sensitive, though.  Those inside the church sometimes seem to make it their business to get offended over the smallest things!  We make the jokes about people getting mad over the color of the carpet and the pews, but the reason we makes those jokes is because it has happened.  I know of at least one church that spit because of the carpet color!  Seriously?!?!  Is that the Kingdom of God here on earth?  It is pathetic that grown men and women can throw a hissy fit over something like that, but it happens all the time:

Ben talks to Marsha.  He mentions that during the last fellowship time, Sandra said, "Marsha's make-up looks fine."  Now, Ben is not the best conversationalist, and he didn't really remember that Sandra actually said, "Marsha's make-up works very well with her skin tone."  Marsha hears "fine" and construes it to mean that she looks like a dead clown with graffiti on her face.  Now she goes to Jorge and Elisa who hear her sad clown story and become angry at Sandra, too.  Soon, the story gets back to Sandra through her friends asking her why she called Marsha "a disgusting painted cow."  She is confused, but the conflict has already peeked.  From the outside, they look like fools.

This big mess and almost all of the other issues like this that arise in the churches today can be taken care of long before they get to this level or even cleaned up at this level by following how Scripture tells us to proceed:

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone.  If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.  But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.  If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church.  And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a pagan or a tax collector" (Matthew 18:15-17).


Now, many of you are probably blaming poor, old Ben already, but Ben was just trying to relay a compliment.  It is not his fault that his memory fails him from time to time on the particulars, and that "fine" actually means "fine" to him.  He was pretty innocent in the matter.  The true problem began with Marsha.  When Marsha heard the word "fine," she decided within herself to take that word in a negative light.  She is one who decided "fine" meant "wrong in every way."  She was too sensitive, and she had second hand information.  Marsha could have proceeded in three ways that would have been keeping with righteousness and godliness:

1. She could have taken "fine" in a positive way.  That is a decision well within her area of control, and it would have stopped any conflict at that point.
2. She could have decided that even if Sandra meant it in a negative way, she was not going to worry about it.  This includes not holding a grudge or speaking about the issue to anyone else.  This would have prevented the conflict from going any further.
3. If the first two options just could not happen, Marsha could have begone the process of church discipline with Sandra by confronting her on the issue in a kind and gentle way and following through with the process in verses 15-17 above.  This also would have taken care of the conflict as Sandra explained what she had really said.

When we enact church discipline, either in cases of brothers or sisters wronging us or in cases when brothers or sisters are doing wrong independent of us, confronting people is never a fun thing to do.  If it becomes fun, you must check your heart because you are most likely guilty of the sin of putting someone else in the wrong which was discussed at the beginning of this.  It doesn't matter whether they are wrong or not at this point.  You need to get the plank out of your eye before you worry about their splinter.

You must confront in gentleness and reasonableness.  The confrontation is for the good of the one being confronted.  Remember this!  No one enjoys being told they are wrong unless they are humble or can look on the situation with complete objectivity, and if they are doing something wrong, it is very likely they have decided to ignore objectivity already.  Emotions can get involved very quickly, and that pushes objectivity even further away.  It is the job of the one confronting to remain calm and bring objectivity back by way of Scripture and reason.  Reason is used primarily as it is reasonable to follow Scripture rather than disregarding it.

Ultimately, it is the job of every believer, for the good of your fellow believers, the church, and the Church universal, to follow this process.  You have been bought by the blood of the Lamb.  You are no longer your own, so you no longer have the right to be offended to the detriment of the body of Christ.  You need to grow a thicker skin and quit putting yourself first.

Why Do Bad Things Happen?

I have been asked this question directly and indirectly many times during my life.  Many people just do not seem able to grasp why bad things can happen when we know that Jesus has paid the penalty for sin and that God is good.  I get that.  I understand why it does not make sense from a certain perspective,  but the truth is that bad things happening to us makes perfect sense.  In fact, Jesus told us that we will face troubles in this life, "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation" (John 16:33a).  The thing that is skewed is the perspective. 

Before you can answer this question, you must first know why you are asking it.  If you are asking it to find the reason why bad things happen in this life, then I have an answer,  If you are asking it to complain or wallow in self pity, I have nothing for you.  The truth will not reach someone who merely wants to bemoan their situation.

Do you value your freewill?  Is the freedom you have to make your own decisions important to you?  God thinks so.  He loves us so much that He gave us freewill in order that when we choose to love Him and follow Him, the choice is not made by manipulation or predisposition.  It is free choice made by the person choosing.  That is real love, and real love cannot exist without the ability to choose.  Adam and Eve chose to sin against God in the garden (Genesis 3:6).  Praise God that now we are free by the blood of the Messiah to choose to love Him, "We love because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19).  Now, that freewill that allows us to truly love God also allows us to do what is wrong.  Freewill has allowed every sin against God to happen, and it has allowed people to sin against anyone one of us, even from the beginning, "Cain spoke to Abel his brother.  And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him.  Then the Lord said to Cain, 'Where is Abel your brother?' He said, 'I do not know; am I my brother’s keeper?' And the Lord said, 'What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to me from the ground.  And now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand'" (Genesis 4:8-11).  If we then have the ability to do evil to one another, that possibility is a reality.  Combine that truth with another truth.  We are a fallen people.  Ever since the Fall, we have a predisposition to do wrong, "The Lord looks down from heaven on the children of man, to see if there are any who understand, who seek after God.  They have all turned aside; together they have become corrupt; there is none who does good, not even one" (Psalm 14:2-3).  The corruption of the first sin goes down to the very heart of humanity, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?" (Jeremiah 17:9).  This corruption is lasting and all-inclusive, "The hearts of the children of man are full of evil, and madness is in their hearts while they live, and after that they go to the dead" (Ecclesiastes 9:3b).  Our depravity is part of our very nature until we are remade by Jesus, "Among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind" (Ephesians 2:3).

That can explain murder, theft, etc., but what about the bad things that happen without being caused by another person?  This answer goes back to the first sin as well.  When mankind first sinned, there were consequences.  God was very clear in laying out what these consequences were, "And to Adam he said, "Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, 'You shall not eat of it,' cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field.  By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return" (Genesis 3:17:19).  Cursed is the ground because of sin.  That encompasses the entirety of the earth.  The earth itself is cursed because of sin, and bad things come of it such as famine, hurricanes, earthquakes, and wildfires.  Some have postulated that it was God sending natural disasters to judge mankind.  I am not arrogant enough to believe I know everything God does, so I will not say either way on that.  However, I do know that our sin cursed the earth, so if natural disasters come upon us from the cursed earth, we are still to blame.

The final source of evil things is the Enemy.  Satan hates us, and he is determined to destroy us in any way he can, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy" (John 10:10a).  However, we have the ability to resist him, "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you" (James 4:7).  Again we have the freewill even to combat the Adversary.  If we choose not to fight him, the responsibility falls not on God but on us.

When you trace back every bad thing to it's source, it will lead back to a fallen person, the curse of the earth, or the Enemy.  In every situation, it is the freewill of mankind that causes all the bad things that happen to us, either through action or inaction.  Blaming God for the wrong that befalls us is ridiculous.  We should be blaming ourselves for not following Him.

Sometimes there are people that put an interesting phrase on the end of the question.  "Why do bad things happen...  to good people?"  Good people?  There are none.  There is only one who is good, "And he said to him, 'Why do you ask me about what is good? There is only one who is good'" Matthew 19:17.  Jesus talks about God.  He talks about Himself.  Here are two responses to that question by a couple very intelligent men.

"Why do bad things happen to good people? That only happened once, and He volunteered" - R.C. Sproul.

Voddie Baucham answers this question with great insight given to him by God:  Voddie's Response.


Ultimately, our hope is in the cross.  Any who look to find comfort in this life look in vain.  This life will not offer what we truly desire.  Only God offers what we need.  Only He can bring us through the bad things to the good.  The fullness of the above verses shows that even though we will face troubles in this life, God will not keep us there.  He has better in mind for us.  "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation.  But take heart; I have overcome the world" (John 16:33).  "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.  I came that they may have life and have it abundantly" (John 10:10).


The next time you find yourself asking why God allows bad things to happen to you or someone else, remember that His concern is not our comfort.  He wants to build our character.  He wants to make us better than we are.  Heaven is the reward, not earth.